Mike got out of jail, and he's stressing me the hell out.
(He made me a flower out of toilet paper while he was locked up though... how cute is that?)
Jason and I broke up, because I'm a dumbass. I had to stuff all his letters and pictures in a drawer. I've been absolutely MISERABLE the past few weeks. As most of you know, I don't handle break ups well.
Jesus Christ, I only dated Jason a few months, and it feels like the end of the world. I can't eat, I can't sleep... this is like Matt all over again. Fucking shoot me. I need to stop getting so attatched to people and then fucking up. I ALWAYS fuck up.
All those Georgetown rednecks are assholes. Justin's an asshole. I should never drink again. I'm so fucking stupid when I drink.
Yeah... everyone was talking about that night for a while, and I have never been so ashamed of myself in my entire life. Yeah... I hate myself. That's fucked up that they would do that to me though.
Why do I care so god damn much what Justin thinks of me anyways? He's just a stupid hick.
I got arrested last week at a party in Round Rock. I was drunk. The whole night's a blur. My probation officer was PISSED.
Tonight was good though. For the first time since Jason left me, I was SO fucking happy. Megan and all her hippy friends from Kerville came down, and it was nice. I was so happy I thought I would explode... then I started coming down, and I remembered why I was so upset all the time.
It's like 4:00 in the morning and I just threw up cough syrup all over the carpet. That was disgusting. I feel like shit. Jason's online. He's not talking to me.
I want to fucking strangle Izzy. I can't believe she'd fucking do that to me.
I feel so empty. There's so many people I could be with if I wanted... but I don't want to be with any of them. I want Jason.
Jordan and I are drifting apart, and it doesn't even feel like we're friends anymore. Infact... he's kind of an asshole to me nowadays. Man... sometimes it felt like that kid was all I had. He was supposed to be my best friend forever. But shit happens, I guess. And you lose people, and you move on with life.
Kaylan's way too cool for me this year. And Sarina's way too busy.
So basically I'm kind of pathetic and alone, and fuck everyone.